I haven’t posted in eleven days.
This is no good. I came home from the holidays sick as a dog and then I had to work eight days in a row so that the hotel I work at could allow its owner’s a short winter break of about four days. Three really, but we all know we work that to trick four days worth of business.
When I finally got around to my own break, I found I really needed to decompress. I didn’t go back to writing. Embarrassingly enough, I looked to a video game I got for Christmas, “Dragon Age: Origins” & the expansion pack, “Dragon Age: Awakenings”. Or maybe that’s the other way around. As I said, I’m drunk and such details seem so insignificant at the moment. I can’t tell the difference.
I gave up video games a good nine years ago. I bought one or two more, but never played them. That’d be Gothic 2 and Ice Wind Dale. I never installed the latter. The former, I played half way through the first chapter, and never even came close to finishing. If I remember the walk through, there were six or seven chapters to Gothic 2, so barely made a dent in that one. Anyway, the point is I stopped playing video games for a reason. I have an addictive personality and I prefer to not let myself get addicted to anything. That’s why every four to six weeks I give up caffeine for a week or so. I don’t want it controlling my life.
The same with video games. The RPGs (Role Playing Games) the computer companies roll out every few years are amazing! I would do nothing else if I could get away with it. Worse yet, the MMORPGs (massively multiplayer online role playing games) like World or Warcraft, or EverQuest, or the like would suck me in like a black hole. No one would ever hear from me again, if I let it happen. I’m very good at the grind they offer.
But I try to not let it happen. I try to keep my world, my own. It’s so hard to not let someone else create the world and I just live in it, but I try to avoid that. I try to create my own.
Why you ask?
I read that and the above as just drunken ramblings, for sure, but it’s true. I work hard to be a creator rather than an imitator. Not that there’s anything wrong with people feeding you content and you becoming a consumer; an imitator. I ask that of the content I create, for you to consume and enjoy, but it’s not me. I’ve always bucked the system and become my own person. That’s just who I am. There’s nothing wrong with just sitting back and enjoying other people’s content. In fact, I recommend it. If not my own, then somebody else’s once in a while. After all, it’s always good to see what others are creating.
The past 2.5 days I did nothing but consume these video games, and I am impressed. How did we go from Pong to Dragon Age in 35 years? Seeing such progress makes it really hard to create my own content, and yet, here I am. Even drunk, coming off a more than two day bender of playing this video game and I can report that I wrote almost 2100 words this afternoon . Sober words. Good words; toward my goal of 25,000 for the month.
I just wanted to post to let everyone know that even when I screw up; even when I get stuck being a consumer like we all are. I can still work toward my goals. In the end, I can still be a creator.
Of course, I can’t wait to read this when I’m sober…